I am fainting on funny vibes.

A mortuary attendant was receiving bodies when he saw this body with the name Fred on it with the longest dick he has ever seen. He decided to cut it off and go show his wife.When he reached home he called out his wife "Darling come I wanna show you something"The wife came and spotting the dick she screamed.. "YOU MEAN FRED IS DEAD!!??
Pastor was preaching in church and he Said "Do Something Crazy For The Lord"
I Could See ladies Removing Their Wigs.
The Pastor Said Again
"Do Something Crazier For The Lord!"
I Saw People dropping their car keys inside the offering box.Now he was like, "Can't you do something the Craziest?"Someone from the back came and took the offering box and was walking out of the church majestically.The pastor shouted "hey! hey!! bring It back this is not craziness;yours is MADNESS
A married woman entered a Pharmacy,she walked to the pharmacist looked straight into his eyes and said: 'I would like to buy FAST KILLING POISON FOR HUMANS'.The bewildered Pharmacist asked: 'Why,what for? The lady replied: 'I need it to poison my husband'.The Pharmacist shouted: 'Lord have mercy,it’s against the law! It’s a sin.'Absolutely not,shouted the lady.She reached into her bag and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the Pharmacist's wife.The pharmacist looked at the picture and screamed:'Why didn’t you tell me you had a Prescription.
A guy visited his Ex girl friend and she gave him food....after a few seconds the dog seated near by started to jump up and down and he said "this dog loves visitors "the child next to him replied "No no.The problem is you are using its plate..."
I have been fainting Since yesterday...when this girl told me she fell from a bike and broke her virginity..but me I have fallen more than 50 times from bike and my virginty is intact..Shift shift  shift I want to continue fainting..
A prostitute visited a doctor because the hair on her privates had stopped growing. She asked,Doc. what could be the cause.
After asking her a few questions,the doctor then asked her?"Have you ever seen grass growing on a busy road?
A lady went to a salon to dress her hair.While dressing her hair,she noticed a handsome man sitting quietly in the shop.Suddenly the lady turned to the man and said Mr.,you are so handsome can we meet later today? Man replied 'I'm married'.The woman continued; "and so? You can just tell your wife you're going to visit a friend in the hospital and from there"...and the man replied;"Tell her yourself, she's the one making your hair".
Abeg shift I want to faint.